Train Journeys last year!

I’ve loved travelling by trains from the core of my heart. I love the way they let you fight with others to place your luggage, the way the reading light extension bangs against your head each time you move, the way you’ve to climb Mount Everest to reach the upper berth, the way some loudmouths talk, the way the washrooms stink, the way the blankets are in awful condition, the way the stale food makes way to your tummy….whoops….Have I sounded sarcastic….???

In a serious vein though, the train journey fun is incomparable. You play cards on the small square table, you keep munching whatever you see, you need not switch off your cells, you can read till dawn, parents are generally in a great mood while travelling and most of all, there’s so much life packed in such a small space…..perfect example of “PEACEFUL?” co-existence!

Journey Begins…

No.1 – Pune – Patna

Ha ha ha….The eventful train journey began with bang. The people(Husband and wife) sitting next to us were the “Know-it-all” kinds. Their guru ‘gyan’ started from work, armed forces, pay scales, recession, stock market to marriages, relations, flirting, education, family planning to etc etc etc! With one word uttered by their young one(4 years old probably), the mother would scream saying, “Aye, kitna baat karti hai?”(Aye, How much do you talk?). I pitied the plight of that bacchu(kid)! I’d have been a juvenile jail had my Ma done that…ha ha(Just Joking Ma)! Each word they spoke was clichéd and but obviously, no one tried to see things beyond the obvious…For once, Radz maintained “PIN-DROP SILENCE”.

No.2 – Patna -Delhi

This one was even better. One mother with two little darling daughters! Haughty in head, this female was trying to be a little too self-reliant. The younger kid was seriously down with cold and cough and that was the background music throughout the journey. The train was running three hours behind schedule, owing to a broken fishplate on one of the tracks! This lady had to catch a connecting flight to Shrinagar and her forecast said that she’s going to miss it….Hell! This female spoke the whole night to her husband and others in Delhi to co-ordinate things assuming that she’s already missed the flight. Whole night - “phone ring, jabbering, coughing”…and more, and more of it! I know I sound drastically evil with this one, but it was maddening! Sympathizing with her would be easy, but only first hand experience would tell you what it was like! She was repeating the same darn thing a million times on the phone! God knows how much balance and battery that phone had? Ha ha! Ms. J that I am!

No.3 – Delhi-Patna

This one was the best! THE BEST! A newly-wed couple! I assume as she was wearing the typical Punjabi ‘chudaa’(Traditional Bangles newly weds need to wear). Flashing fluorescent yellow saree with sequin work was the lady’s drape. This time dad and mom were sitting on one side with me occupying the opposite window seat. This couple had to get cozy on the berth where Ma & Pa were sitting. Ha ha ha! (It sure didn’t remind them of their Honeymoon!) That equals to 2 + 2 = 4 people sitting on one berth! Rajdhaani was fun as there is some edible time pass coming your way every moment! The train honeymoon started. This couple was out of the way bold for an “ANTI-PDA(Public Display of Affection) person like me. All the mushy exchanges, lovey-dovey expressions, “Can I touch you there”…(Michael Bolton if I’m not wrong) types was the scene. Mamma and Pappa were just laughing it off sharing some intellectual jokes of their sorts and I just sat imagining so much! You know what right? Ha ha. You see the same all around, but ya, you can take your eyes off limiting yourself from certain distracting visuals…ha ha! But here, it was just so impossible! Idiots! Limit of showing that desperation is at its pinnacle and that overflowing love will just pour out if you don’t cuddle up and do all that they were doing. I would’ve puked! Isn’t there anything royal about being romantic? Ha ha…Rest is upto you people to imagine now….The only respite for me was that these two slept on different berths….LMAO….otherwise you know what! - “Ding Dong….(I love Hum Tum!)

No.4 – Patna – Pune

These days I realized that people don’t like to mingle with each other in trains. I’m this person who always seeks some kind of cultural exchanges but the droopy response is just too disheartening. There was this one family in the compartment - (Wife, 2 daughters and mother-in-law). The daughters were spoilt brats and blabbered in their squeaky and shrill tones non-stop! God pardon me for mocking at things but I’m too helpless! The mother-in-law was suffering from Diabetes so do you get it guys? She made the whole compartment her “OFFICIAL FART ZONE”! Now you know how it was!………Smelly!

Trust me, she’d make the perfect farting DJ in this world…no more on this one…….laughs laughs laughs!